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Wednesday, March 30, 2011

The Thing I Forget

These are my sons. Each of them is an amazing individual. It is nothing short of a miracle that each of them is here as my son with me as their mother. Although each of them has a unique story of how they came into my life, each of them is as much my son as the next one.

I've had several people comment how at first they couldn't believe how pale Sean and Aaron were. They were so used to seeing Marcus and Will and their dark skin, that it just didn't occur to them that our other children would be lighter toned. I forget sometimes that Marcus and Will didn't come into our lives in the traditional way. Good to know that I am not the only one.

Today I had the opportunity to meet up with a bunch of the preschool moms at an indoor play area. There is a new kid in Marcus's class and his mother was looking to get to know some of the other moms. I haven't seen most of the moms for quite some time since my own mother has been taking the kids to school. I had yet to meet this new mom. I walked in and she looked at Marcus and said, "I recognize you!" I said, "Oh, you must be the mother of the new boy in Marcus's class." The conversation went on. Introductions were made. I was a little distracted because Marcus and Will were asking me if they could go play and I was trying to decide where to put the two baby car seats that needed to be unloaded before I dropped them. During all this, the new mom was asking some confusing questions like, "Are these [pointing at the babies] your babies?" "Who normally drops Marcus off at school?" "Are you the mom?" I answered politely and wondered if this lady was obtuse because of course I was the mom. Who other than a mother would be crazy enough to show up at a crazy play place with four boys? Babysitters and aunts are far too smart for that.

It never even occurred to me until late this evening why she was asking what seemed to be weird and confused questions. She couldn't wrap her head around how I could walk in with my red hair and freckled skin with those four beautiful boys of mine and be a mother to them all. I am sure she was able to figure it all out eventually, and without asking intruding questions. So kudos to her. Because it is the thing I forget. I forget that this wonderful family of mine that feels so natural and perfect and filled with love on the inside, doesn't always look like the "normal" family that it is.


Friday, March 18, 2011


Sean is my cuddly boy, mainly because he insists on being held almost all of the time. I am almost surprised by the times I can set him on a blanket for a few minutes and walk away and he stays completely happy. He is really starting to become a chubby little baby. His favorite thing is eating. Sean likes to be held up facing the world to see what is going on. His little tongue is always sticking out and he tries to lick everything. He naps great during the day, as long as he is being held. Thankfully he sleeps great at night in the cosleeper. And just like Aaron, he has a smile that could bring world peace. Sean is even cute when he is mad.

(This last picture shows how we keep his pacifier from falling out after every suck.)


Thursday, March 17, 2011


Aaron is still my little guy, weighing just over 7 lbs. He is unbelievably strong. He has rolled himself over from belly to back a few times, holds up his head, and can support himself on his hands during tummy time (although he HATES tummy time). Aaron is an easy baby, so easy that sometimes I feel that he gets cheated. Probably because of his size and his prematurity, he sleeps a lot. There are times during the day he needs rocked to sleep, but a lot of the time I can still just stick him in his swing drowsy and off to dream land he goes. He makes the cutest little pouty face just before he starts to cry that I have yet to capture on film. When it is time to eat, Aaron wants to eat NOW. This week he started smiling. I can't think of a single problem in this world that couldn't be forgotten instantly when a little baby smiles.


Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Marcus: The Biggest Brother

Marcus and Aaron

Marcus and Sean


Tuesday, March 15, 2011


I am sure it is no surprise that I haven't really been up to anything too crafty lately. I don't seem to have enough arms to do non-crafty things. When I was pregnant I did manage to make two baby boleros and two matching hats.

The hats are still a little big and look rather funky. But there is potential.

The hats do fit a little better now than they did when Sean was 5 days old.


Friday, March 11, 2011

2.5 Months

Just got back from the little guys' 2 month check up, even though they are more like 2.5 months. They are both healthy (not including the little Children's Hospital incident this week) and growing. Aaron weighs 7 lbs 3 oz (0 percentile), is 19.25 inches long (0 percentile) and his head circumference is 36.5 cm (1st percentile). Sean now weighs 8 lbs 12 oz (1st percentile), is 19.5 inches long (0 percentile), and his head circumference is 37 cm (2nd percentile). So, I got some really big boys!


Thursday, March 10, 2011

Children's Hospital

Finally got to check out the somewhat new Pittsburgh Children's Hospital. I have heard a lot of good things about it. Just really wished we could have been there under different circumstances.

Aaron just hasn't been himself lately. No idea if it is related, but he has been more cranky over the past week or so. Didn't think anything of it because he's a baby. Babies get cranky. Early morning Tuesday, Greg fed Aaron and shortly after there was a vomit incident. It has happened before. You have kids, you have vomit. On Tuesday morning I fed him around 10:30 and soon, he was just crazy. He was screaming like a madman and anything I tried to calm him down just wasn't working. His body was rigid and his little fists were bunched up so tight. Eventually I laid him down to put on my Moby Wrap, and he fell asleep on the floor. The rest of the day, he was pretty much his normal self. Around 6:00, I changed his diaper and it was evident that there was something wrong. I frantically called the pediatrician... and was put on hold for 20 minutes. I got thrown up on while I waited. Finally I was given instructions that he probably had a hernia and we needed to take him to Children's Hospital. I needed to track down my mom to come watch the big kids. There were more frantic phone calls and some text messages and me hyperventilating on the phone while I attempted to talk to my sister. And then we were off.

We arrived at 8pm and by 9pm we had been registered, checked in by a nurse, seen by a doctor, and got a diagnosis of a hernia. Apparently 1 in 3 preemie boys get them. So it was no big deal. Or it was supposed to be. But it was our little baby so it was a huge deal. We had to wait to see a surgeon who was supposed to be right down. An ultrasound and three hours later (and I got barfed on again), we finally saw the surgeon. The surgeon was able to "reduce the hernia" which involved putting his innards back behind the wall of the muscle. Greg and I (and Sean, who was along for the ride) were sent to the waiting room while they reduced his hernia since it was apparently rather painful and not something we wanted to watch. So instead I cried in the waiting room knowing my little guy was in pain. The plan was to have us sent to a room and on Wednesday morning he would have surgery as soon as there was an opening in the schedule. We waited in the ER room for another 3 hours and finally got to our room at 3am. Aaron was not allowed to eat after 4am to prepare for the surgery.

There was some attempt at sleep and lots of waiting. Aaron's cries of hunger broke my heart because it was something I could fix so easily but wasn't allowed. He cried. I cried. Morning went by and there was no surgery. We were told that there was an opening on the ER schedule for Friday so if we couldn't get in, we could come back Friday. I was about to throw in the towel and just feed my little guy (who is over 7 lbs now!), when there was finally an opening.

It was odd to be on the waiting side of a surgical procedure. I'm always the one getting the surgery. It sucked. We were amused by the family who was letting their 2 year old chew on a can of Skoal. We met a family who has two teenage sons who they adopted from Guatemala. We met an Amish family who's granddaughter had open heart surgery. Finally we could see Aaron. Poor guy. His little cry was so weak and sad. But he was out of surgery and doing just fine. Even Sean seemed excited to see him.

Because of Aaron's size and the fact that he was premature, they had him stay overnight for observation. Soon he was back to eating normally and as long as he was on Tylenol, he seemed okay. There was more waiting this morning before we could finally head for home. For now, it seems the worst is behind us. I missed Marcus and Will so much and was so glad to be back with them today.

I used to think that I was awesome in a crisis. I think clearly and act fast. After everything that happened in the past few days, I am really hoping my kids never have any other health problems ever. This being a worrying mother thing sucks.


Tuesday, March 01, 2011

2 Months

My little guys are two months old today! Or maybe they will never be 2 months old since they were born on the 29th and there is no 29th of February.